BILLY RHYTHM'S PSYCHO BABBLE MI-5

Billy Rhythm says: "Use this word equation, fill in the variable with each of the five words, and answer on your blog. Sorry they're not all that good. I was trying to think of something cool, but nothing came to me."

"If I were an "X," I'd be a (blank), and here's why..." For the variable X, insert each of these:

1) Snack cake: If I were a snack cake, I'd be a Twinkee, and here's why...Twinkies are blonde, and so am I. Twinkies are nothing exciting to look at, and neither am I. Twinkies are sweet inside, and I think I'm kindda sweet, too.

2) Car: If I were a car, I'd be some sort of economy sedan trying to look like a sports car, and here's why...I can only afford economy cars, but inside, I'd really love a Mazda RX-7, or a Mazda Miatta, or a some other sort of really sport car. But, I'm a Mom, and efficiency has to rule over sportiness.

3) Kitchen Utensil: If I were a kitchen utensil, I'd be a butter knife, and here's why...I love bread and butter, especially a crusty bread that's really soft inside. With my new healthy eating habits, however, I'm not eating a whole lot of it, and I'm missing it.

4) Famous Rich Person: If I were a famous rich person, I'd be Bill Gates, and here's why...If I had lots of money, I'd really love to do lots of good with it, and while I don't know a lot about all of Bill Gates' "causes", I do know that he's very philantropic, and I'd like to be like that.

5) Over the counter medicine: If I were an over the counter medicine, I'd be Advil, and here's why...I hate to see people hurt (especially emotionally), and I like to try to make people feel better. Maybe that would really fall into a psychotic type of drug, but I don't know anything about those.